Do you sometimes feel misunderstood?

Do you find that you work with some people that they seem to “speak your language” whilst there are others who you, despite your best efforts, you can’t quite seem to get along with?

I used to have a colleague who I had a very uncomfortable working relationship with. Whenever we had to work together on projects we seemed to rub each other up the wrong way – I’d walk away from meetings frustrated by his lack of flexibility and what I perceived to be his pedantic nature. I’d bemoan how he fixated on the minutia when there were what I considered to be more significant considerations and how he seemed to have little interest in thee implications of his plans on other colleagues.

I wish I’d known then what I know now about different behavioural preferences and the impact that they have on how we communicate with other people. What I know now is that he and I simply oriented with the world in a different way – where I wanted to engage in some blue sky thinking, he needed to know the specifics of how things would work in practice; where I wanted to bounce ideas around and create plans in the moment he wanted more time to reflect on what was being proposed.

Once of the great tools I’ve had the good fortune to train in – which shines a light on behavioural preferences is Clarity4D. In a really easy to understand format Clarity4D reveals how we naturally prefer to behave and in turn how we engage with others and how we like to be communicated with.

Now that I better understand my own preferred way of behaving and responding to others - and also have a wider appreciation of the range of other preferences - I’ve noticed that I am much more patient in my interactions with people who lead with different preferences (or to use Clarity4D language “colour energies”). These days, rather than jumping into judgement of their behaviour – I get curious and stop and think where are they coming from, and how might I flex so that we can find some mutual ground.

“Bringing my leadership team together for a session facilitated by Sarah was really valuable. We know each other pretty well but using Clarity4D opened up conversations about who we are and how we work together as a team that wouldn’t ordinarily have happened; it was really interesting to explore the perceptions we have of each other and it gave us a greater understanding of our different behavioural preferences and how we can adapt for better working relationships – and results”. Paul Jackson Chairman ASTUS Group.

It’s powerful stuff (even my other half who has a finely tuned “woo-woo” radar is a fan!) and I’m keen for as many people as possible to have the insight that comes from exploring their Clarity4D profile. As a Clarity4D Business Partner I am offering 2 free profiles + an hours coaching debrief in November and December. Interested to hear more? Please drop me an email at sarah@boldly-go.co.uk